a new chapter

Do you like change? I do not. Like not even a little bit. True story: right after Austin was born, I went through a troubling phase in which I ate a hot dog {no chili}, fruit, and chips with salsa for lunch. Every. Single. Day. To be fair, we had a new baby, had just moved to a new city, and were looking for a new house. I needed something that would be the same when everything else was complete chaos. I like routines and knowing what to expect each day. Obviously. 

Over the years, God has been very patient with me when change is looming up ahead. Usually He prepares me in advance. Because He cares about the people in my life that have to deal with me on a daily basis. 

Once again, I find Him preparing me for yet another change. For the last couple of years, Luke has talked about having some sort of family business, but financially, it just didn't make sense. We have kids. Kids get sick. A lot. So insurance is kind of a big deal. Not to mention all the perks of having a paycheck you can count on each month. I'm sure you can guess my reaction to walking away from all of that. We both knew it wasn't the right timing, and if it was something God had for us, He would have to pave the way. 

This year started like any other year. We spent the first part of 2015 with Luke's family. All of them are self-employed. So everyday, Luke would get up and drive downtown to his job while everyone else walked down the hall to their "office." And then I heard the words "family business" being thrown around all casual like we were just talking about the weather. PEOPLE, let me be a truth-teller in your lives. THIS IS NOT THE WEATHER!! We are talking about change and unknown things and taking advantage of Obamacare! I can't even.

 One night Luke mentioned to me that he might be interested in doing some accounting stuff with his brother on the side. The best of both worlds, right? I was totally on board for that. But then he called me one day and told me that his dad wanted him to pray about being a part of the new company he started about a year ago. I wanted to make sure I was hearing him right so I said, 

"Like leave AT&T?"
"Yes."
*crickets*

Needless to say, we talked about this decision AD NAUSEAM for days and prayed. There was quite a bit of praying. We were excited and a little terrified. We definitely felt like we were crazy. Still, everything seemed to be falling into place, and as scary as this life change appeared, we both felt a peace about the decision to start a new chapter in our lives. That's big considering that we're both the oldest children in our families, which basically means we're super responsible. Risk is something we don't typically do. But this has been a dream of Luke's for quite some time. If there's one thing I know about our Heavenly Father it's that He cares about our dreams. And then He dreams BIGGER than we could possibly imagine. He's awesome like that.

Today is the last day of the known, and tomorrow is the first day of the unknown. We've asked ourselves a million times if we're crazy to walk away from the benefits of working for a large corporation. We are crazy. AT&T has been a wonderful to Luke. They truly care about their employees, and we are so grateful for the opportunities provided to Luke while working there. 

But here's the deal, God is crazy. He sent His Son to die on a cross for a bunch of sinners that were undeserving of such an extravagant love. So no, I don't love change, but I do love my Heavenly Father. I know He's calling us out of the boat into a place that requires greater trust and a deeper faith. I keep telling Him I'm not ready, but I don't think we're on the same page. Per the usual. Oh, and also, I keep telling Him that it doesn't feel like we're stepping out of a boat. It feels more like we're jumping off a cliff. 

{via}

I guarantee you those people are NOT oldest children. No way would we jump off a cliff and destroy a dress that cost our parents an arm. And maybe part of their leg. For all that's good and holy, preserve that thing in your attic. It's the responsible thing to do for crying out loud. 

I know it won't be easy. Luke will be out of town for a week every month. There will be long hours and sacrifices on both our parts. But we believe it will be worth it. Luke will be working from home with a more flexible schedule that will allow him to be a part of more family activities. He will get to work with some of his favorite people, which is exciting and a prayer request all at the same time. 

In the words of Michael Buble "it's a new dawn, it's a new day," we're feeling mostly good. Here's to new chapters, taking risks, and dreaming God-sized dreams!

goals, goals, and more goals

Remember when I told you that Luke and I set some goals? In February? Better late than never, I say. Last night we finally sat down to put those goals on paper. Or phone rather since he sent them to me via text after our conversation. Technology is a wonderful thing. Until it's slow, freezes, or dies. Nothing makes you feel more isolated than realizing you can't access your contacts list, therefore; you cannot communicate with the outside world because WHO MEMORIZES PHONE NUMBERS ANYMORE?! 

Anyway, we committed to a few goals. And by a few, I mean the text message looked like Austin and Brooke's Christmas list for Santa: long. I felt the same way last night as I did when I received their lists: overwhelmed. 

True story: when my sister was little, she thought it would be a good idea to cut her own bangs. So she did. And then hid the evidence under her dresser, because it's not like my mom would notice that her bangs were 2 inches shorter and cut at an angle. It took weeks for her bangs to grow back to an acceptable length, and even longer before either of us was allowed to do any sort of craft involving scissors. Since then we've both had bangs and then waited for them to grow out. Now we both have bangs again. Go figure.

And you better believe we know better than to try to cut those bad boys ourselves. So if my mom can wait a sweet forever for Britt's bangs to grow back, then I suppose I can commit to a few goals and stick with them. Even if it gets ugly. Oh, who am I kidding?! When it gets ugly. 

Here are a few of the goals we agreed on: 

1} Pray together everyday. If there's one thing the our family needs, it's a lot of Jesus up in this house. Hallelujah. Amen.

2} Read the Bible everyday. Again, we need A LOT of Jesus up in here. Strong-willed child, career changes, and life in general. You get the idea.

3} One date night per week, and we alternate who plans it. I can't say for certain, but I have a strong feeling that several of my dates will involve comfortable clothes. 

4} At least 4 dinners at the table together per week. I mean, who doesn't want to look at these faces while they eat and try to talk to us at the same time. See-Food: it's what's for dinner. 

Side note: Brooke looks so little. However, she still tries to talk and chew at the same time so not everything is changing.  What a relief. 

4} One family activity per week. We took the kids to see Paddington last weekend. It was our second attempt to go see a movie with Brooke. The last time was full of hope and promise...

...and then she ran up and down the aisles for half of the movie. Moral of the story: sometimes hope and promise isn't enough. Thank goodness we were the only ones in the theater. God's gift to us that day for sure. Luckily, she did much better this past weekend, which means we can now add "Movies" to our list of approved family activities. 

5} Get healthy. This is where I suspect things could get ugly.

6} Save money. I wish I could say that I was the one obsessed with saving money in our marriage. I'm not. In fact, I've contemplated jumping on the Coupon Train but the whole process totally stresses me out. I will never need 20 tubes of toothpaste at one time. Ever.  No matter how big the savings are. I mean where do you even store that much stuff if you don't have some kind of Armageddon closet?! So basically, I'm just really going to miss Target...

Nothing worth doing is ever easy right? At least that's what I tell myself every time I take my strong-willed child to time out. For the tenth time that day. Luke and I feel like for the last couple of years we've been in Survival Mode, and that's not the way we want to live our lives. Don't get me wrong. Some days Survival Mode is the only thing you're capable of doing, and that's okay. We just decided that we want that way of thinking to be the exception instead of the rule. I'm not gonna lie, I get overwhelmed pretty easily. {see above comment about couponing} I think it's because I tend to focus too far ahead when I should just be taking things one step at a time. So this is my new motto:

{via}

Sure, I want to get to swimsuit season and not feel like a beached whale every time I take the kids swimming. However, I'm not one that can look that far ahead and feel more motivated about achieving my goals. I'm the type that will think to myself, "You know, I've been wanting to try a cleanse. Maybe I'll do that the last week in May." Bad idea. On so many levels. 

Here's the thing we should remember when we set goals. This is our chance to dream bigger, live better, and reach our full potential. It's not easy. Everyday we have a series of choices to make, but, I believe that with God anything is possible! Let's face it, defeat is not in our DNA since we were created in His image. In fact, the Bible is full of stories in which God did the impossible just because He is that good. So let's not be afraid to set big goals and ask God to do not just what is possible but what is impossible! He is able to do more than we can ask or imagine...so ask BIG! 

life lately

So far 2015 has been busy and full of fun. We celebrated the new year in Colorado...

We spent some time in Denver with Jared, Lindsay, and Matt followed by time in the mountains with my family.

We were ready to get home and back in our own beds. Also, I was ready to feel my fingers and toes on a regular basis, which is why I was super thrilled to be greeted by a broken heater. Oh and did I mention that we were getting ready to host a house full of people? Ready, set, PANIC!! Meanwhile, Luke was calmly working in the attic to figure out what the heck went wrong while we were gone. And that's why we're a good match. I take care of the drama and he solves the problem. I'm supportive like that. 

Then we spent the next two weeks with Luke's side of the family celebrating a very late Keiffer Christmas. We got to enjoy a little Lady A and the National Championship thanks to a couple of family members blessing us with their connections. And I got to pretend I was cooler than I really am. 

Ummm yeah, that last picture proves that Lindsay and I aren't the only crazy ones in our marriages. We had the best time! And then real life smacked me in the face the next day in the form of the flu. Everyone belly up to the Tamiflu bar!! This little guy was out of school for a WEEK AND A HALF! 

Thanks for nothin' flu mist. 

Life has gotten back to normal now with school, sports, and lots of long work days for Luke. We're gearing up for another big change, but that's a post for another time. I don't have time to hyperventilate today. 

Luke and I ride the emotional roller coaster that is our daughter Brooke on a daily basis. I promise I have no idea where she gets her crazy. Austin is getting too big, but moments like these remind me that I have a little bit longer before I have to admit he's a big boy. 

The day he says goodbye to Lambie will be the day you find me curled up in the fetal position crying my eyes out. 

I can't believe how fast time flies, especially since the afternoons can feel like a sweet forever! I'm so thankful I get to call these people mine. 

this lady turns 91 today and i'm honored to call her my granny

Today is my Granny's 91st birthday. I love the above picture of her. She is truly beautiful inside and out. Words could not possibly express how much she means to me, but you know I love words so I'll do my best. 

As far back as I can remember, my Granny has been an integral part of our lives. She loves the color pink and dancing to Frank Sinatra. She thinks Michael Buble is sexy {I feel weird when anyone over the age of 50 uses that word} and sometimes yells "whiskey!" to make us smile while we're taking pictures. Speaking of picture taking, it is nearly impossible to capture one of her with her eyes open, which is why I love this picture so much. 

Well, her eyes are mostly open, but her smile is really my favorite thing about this moment frozen in time. I love so many things about my Granny like the way she closes her eyes when she takes a sip of her tea or the fact that she hollers "woo hoo!" as she walks into the room. Of course, we always stop what we're doing to hug her neck and tell her how nice she looks. And she always looks nice, because if there's one thing my Granny has an appreciation for, it's beautiful things. When it comes to keeping those beautiful things in top condition, she's the best there is. I have yet to see a speck of dust in her home, and she wrote the book on organization. Basically, she's the Queen of Clean and I aspire to run my home the way she has for so many years. Notice I said "aspire" because it's a work in progress. More work than progress. Because trying to clean your house with kids around is like trying to nail jello to a tree. 

I will never forget the time she came over to help me unpack when we moved to San Antonio. Every surface was covered with some kind of knick-knack to the point that it looked like the moving truck had vomited our stuff right out the back and into our new house. And don't even get me started on the other boxes still sitting unpacked in our hallways. They were having babies overnight. I promise. She walked right in and set her purse down ready to get to work. She never even knew that as I walked around the corner to get some cleaning supplies I heard her say, 

"Well, bless her heart! This place is a mess!" 

Bless her for thinking she was stating that fact when I was out of earshot. These days she lives by the idea that honesty is the best policy. I think when you get older you just don't care that your filter is broken. And why should you? You've put in more time on this earth than most of your family so it's best not to leave certain things unspoken. 

She's the mom of three boys, a Granny to six grandchildren, a Great-Granny to five great-grandchildren, and the matriarch of the Bauerlein family. 

Here's the thing about trying to get a group picture when little people are involved...set your expectations low. And when you think they're low enough, go lower. Please note that neither of my children are smiling. As for the other short people, well, they look about as impressed with this adventure as the rest of the world was with Kanye's Grammy outburst. Real life. Happening 24/7.

She's faced plenty of hardships over the decades of her life. Her first husband, who we called Paw Paw, fought in WWII while she worked and waited for him to come back home. He wrote her some of the sweetest notes, but keep in mind, there wasn't FaceTime. Or email. Or Skype. Many years later, she sent her oldest son to Vietnam. My Paw Paw was attacked one night by someone who stabbed him. God protected him during that incident, but he was unable to fight an infection years later as a result of the measures taken to save his life. Within a week, she was saying goodbye to her best friend and the love of her life. I have such respect for the strength she has modeled for all of us through the good times and bad!

More than anything, I want her to know how thankful I am for loving us so well over the years. She has spent countless weeks helping to take care of us when we were babies or my parents went out of town. She came to San Antonio when I had my tonsils out and kept my room dusted. Obviously, my mom had never loved her more. We spent a week with her every summer and thanksgivings around her table. She cooked Chicken and Dumplings, her specialty, more times than I can count. We've laughed at the things she says and the stories she can tell. 

Her memory has begun to fade, and we know that God will call her home long before any of us is ready. When that day comes, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that her legacy will be remembered and passed down through the generations of our family. She has lived out 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and I can't think of a better person to celebrate this close to Valentines Day. 

Happy Birthday, Granny! 

I wish I could be there to sing Happy Birthday and tell you in person how thankful I am that God chose you to be my Granny. You hold a special place in my heart that no one else will ever fill. I love you!! 

pilates? oh, I thought you said pie and lattes

Happy Monday! I'm always a little sad when the weekend comes to an end, but routines are nice and necessary. Luke had to work all day Saturday so we spent Sunday as a family. However, Luke and I did get to enjoy a lunch date and do you want to know what our main topic of conversation was? It wasn't about the kids, which I realize is shocking. Don't all parents talk about their kids when they're out and don't have to worry about saying things like, "Please eat your food. There will not be a second meal served at home." We actually discussed goals for the new year. In February. Because we like to be fashionably late to parties. We also like to keep up with the trends, so of course, one of the things on our agenda was Getting Healthy. We sat there eating bread with plenty of butter and then decided that we will be cutting back on carbs and sugar. It seemed like the responsible thing to do. 

I've actually found some really good recipes that are low in sugar and carbs. Stuffed bell peppers, tacos in corn tortillas, and we can have steak with vegetables. On my side of the family, steak is kind of a big deal. I'll be sure to post the good ones. Honestly, it's the snacking that gets me. I have read many a parenting book and no one tells you that you may be tempted to finish off your child's goldfish and leftover mac and cheese. But for the love of all that's good and holy, walk away and drink a glass of water! Or eat a bunch of celery. It's practically the same thing. 

I will also be doing a little redecorating. 

Of course there will also be some exercise. And by some, I mean I will pop in a DVD and listen to the instructor tell me that there is no easy version for a jumping jack and do squats until walking down our stairs feels like a slow, painful death. 

But seriously, I feel like part of my job is to make sure my family is eating healthy not to mention setting a good example for our little people. Austin actually likes more vegetables than Luke does. He's my buddy when it comes to bell peppers, greek salad, and asparagus. Both of the kids like to workout with me which is probably one of the cutest things I've ever seen. It's also super motivating when you're ready to call it quits and they're not even breathing hard. Some days I push through and other days I offer them a cookie. Listen, I can't win the "Mom of the Year" award everyday. It does do my heart good, though, to see them following my lead and loving our time together. 

So if you find yourself losing heart and ready to give up on your new year's goal of looking amazing in a bathing suit come summer, know that you're not alone. We're working hard over here too. It is possible to walk into Target and see the tiny swimsuits in the juniors department without having a severe anxiety attack followed by labored breathing that feels strangely foreign because it's been awhile since you worked out. We've got 4 months. Okay 3 and a half until summer. We have plenty of time to make good progress on our goals. Here's to not going on a diet but living a healthier lifestyle! 

fancy friday

Happy Friday, friends! I used to think that once I was working from home I wouldn't get as excited about the weekend, but I was wrong. So very wrong! Now Fridays mean just one more day until we're all home together for TWO WHOLE DAYS! And I have backup. Just keepin' it real. 

Once upon a time long ago, Fridays meant date night for Luke and me. We used to dress up and go out to eat...maybe see a movie. One thing is for sure, though, we would definitely stay up way past what our bedtime is these days. Don't get me wrong, we still have date nights on Fridays to celebrate the fact that we made it through another week. However, we usually order take-out, put on comfy clothes, and clean out the DVR. Because we're raising little people. And we're tired. Plus, I'm sure the time will come all too soon when we'll have our Friday nights back and go out to eat. You know, around 4pm with all the other blue hairs.

Occasionally, the grandparents will bless us with a date night out. We dress up, kiss the littles, and high-tail it outta there before Brooke has a meltdown resulting in the grandparents suggesting dessert instead of dinner. It's nice to relive the days when kids were just a dream, and our metabolism could handle carb loading at a fancy Italian restaurant. So in honor of days gone by and days yet to come, here are some pretty little numbers I would love to wear while out with my man.


I love this entire outfit. 

It's also really cool that she's been blessed with the kind of skin tone that looks golden all year round. I do not enjoy such a luxury. Self-tanner is my friend. 

If we were going on a really fancy date, I would definitely wear this.

With these shoes.

And these earrings.

Because nothing says fun like glitter. So much glitter! Unfortunately, the dress alone costs $900, and Luke did not pick the winning Power Ball numbers so I'm out of luck. 

Since I'm solo parenting until tomorrow night, our weekly date will have to take place on Sunday. Today, Brooke and I will be cleaning while Austin is at school. Because we love to live the glamorous life. And then I'm going to pick out something cute to wear when Luke gets home tomorrow. Apparently he folded laundry for me the other day and noticed there were a lot of yoga pants in the mix. What can I say? Some weeks I live by this motto.

To be fair, though, most days I really do put forth an effort to wear something other than sweats. I feel much better about myself if I do. Don't you? And I have to brag on my husband for a minute and tell you that he never gives me a hard time about what I'm wearing. Probably because he wants to live to see the next day, but also, he loves me no matter what. Some days it's the inside that counts. Am I right?!

I may not get to enjoy a date with Luke tonight but these two will keep me company and entertained instead. 

Our night together will probably involve me saying "no" to Chuck E Cheese and compromising on another location that serves pizza before we head to Austin's basketball practice. It won't be fancy, but it will be fun. I wouldn't trade my messy, crazy life for anything in the world!